The bodybuilding cutting phase

Expectation vs reality

The prep for my first bodybuilding show has taken about 3 times longer than I had originally expected. Ha...the curse of expectation which I'm slowly learning to bin. My body is going to do what it wants to do - it has it's own agenda and rate of change!

I am now going into what I hope will be my last and final 12 week prep. I'm going into it relatively healthy, flu free, with a good fitness foundation, so that is a positive. The goal is to maintain muscle mass and reduce body fat (cutting) to allow me to tick the boxes that mean I can compete in physique category. This essentially means a low fat physique with a good degree of muscularity, good conditioning and nice full muscles. Creating this is tricky, it's a very precise combination of cardio, diet, training and probably drugs. In truth, this is where smart dosing of good quality anabolics like Anavar (Oxondrolone) and Winstrol (Stanozolol) probably make a big difference to the quality of conditioning. They allow preservation of muscle mass whilst reducing body fat which is hard to do in women.

I have been unbelievably resistant to successful "cutting" and I was previously blaming it on my body, but actually in all honesty I believe it's because I don't really want to do it. My desire to be 6-8% body fat in truth, is just not very strong. It's also the one sport, where the closer you get to competition, the weaker and less fit you get (calorie deficit will do that!).

I come from a non-aesthetic performance based sporting background, so partaking in an aesthetic sport creates all sorts of mental obstacles. In truth it's going to be very hard to change my values and my core beliefs, but you can create a strategy that is more or less in line with what you do believe. Just as there are things that conflict with my nature doing this sport, there are lots of things about doing a bodybuilding competition that are in line with my values. It is a sport at the end of the day and requires precision training, nutrition and absolute dedication and so it is just a question of tapping into the things that fuel that.

The challenge for me was to see if I could train myself for my first show; to enjoy, learn and grow from the process, both physically and mentally. I had huge help for the first 3 months with program design but then decided to go it alone, as that was more in line with my particular goal of learning about training and nutrition. Having spoken to a number of competitors, I think motivation and desire for doing this sport are so varied, individual and deeply personal.

Motivation and Sport

These two words are so well intertwined. To me, motivation is key to doing things well. You can have the best programs in the world for training but if they are not executed with full attention and intention, it is wasted. So, what ever it is you need to do to create that motivation is a part of optimal training. Some people are very self motivated and train alone and others need a training partner or training group. It's all highly personal what you need to get the best out of yourself. Identifying what it is and being able to create motivation from nothing, when you really don't want to do something is also essential, because often it is beyond the skill of a coach or friend to do that.

Let go of resistance - "fasted" cardio and muscular endurance

I have found unfortunately that the very thing I do not want to do, is usually the thing that is going to make all the difference. For me, that nemesis is 1) "fasted" cardio, first thing in the morning and 2) muscular endurance training (reps of 15+). I literally want to cry at the thought of both these things and I have tried avoiding these, with substitutions of all permutations of late afternoon HITT training (because I like it) but with no real result. Last week out of desperation, I made the conscious decision that I was going to do both these things that I detest, for a 4 week training block. For endurance training this was going to be trisets of +15 reps for a body part, with no rest - 1 min rest between sets.
Leg training might look something like; back squats, walking lunges and dumbbell deadlift as a single triset.

It is really not a pretty sight, watching me try and tie my shoe laces at some absurd hour in the morning. Luckily the only witness to this is my beloved blind and deaf labrador. It is a usual ritual of tripping over on my face before finally facing the park for some early morning running. Actually running is being way too generous of a description...it is more a walk - trot - jog.

The really interesting thing about facing a real internal conflict with not wanting to do something, is once you realise that you are in fact going to do it, you might as well enjoy it. You let go of that resistance and although you may not want to be there, you are "ok" with being there and you just allow it to happen, rather than force it to happen. So, I put on some motivating music or an audiobook and enjoy the ride. Reassessing goals is part of the process here too. The objective is not performance (running fast), as it would have been previously - it is just to keep heart rate at a low- moderate rate for 45-60 mins to aid fat metabolism.
This has actually been an epiphany, not just for training but for things in everyday life, because I tend to fight reality sometimes - wishing I was someplace rather than where I am. I suppose it is a practical way of practicing mindfulness - a useful skill in sport.

So, although resistance training is a great idea, resistance of situations is a really bad idea. It makes everything very very hard. Coping with being in a situation you don't really want to be in is really about just being "ok" with it - being present so to speak and it is never as bad as you think. A week in and I actually quite enjoy my "foodless, sleepless" runs and the beauty of it is, I am starting to see the benefit in a little bit more muscle definition. I don't like this physique or not like it any better but it allows me to tick the boxes I need to for this show.
I was recently speaking to another female competitor. She faced the same battles with struggling to cut weight and revealed she feels so stressed and in conflict with her body. I can't offer scientific explanations for what is going on physiologically but it does seem to be a theme, that struggle, striving and resistance don't work very well for getting results.

Become familiar with what truly motivates

Everybody will experience different challenges in a contest prep and those challenges will be different in each prep. The body and the mind won't always respond the same way and how we want them to, but for me...letting go of expectation has proved immensely valuable because creating calm and enjoyment for me increases motivation.  For others, perhaps it is the opposite. Increasing the pressure and expectation may work better but it is undoubtably a question of finding what taps into creating one's own and ever changing motivation.

A reflection - Gauging Success and Failure

I suppose the intrigue for me when observing those that excel at a sport is the mind set and attitude that pull it all together. That, is the interesting part for me as there is a limit to the number of ways one can manipulate training variables and exercises.

It made me think about about how I reevaluate a phase of training or what I deem to be a success or failure. So....5 months of structured, consistent training and this is where I am now.
(I was determined to not post a whole canvas of before and after photos and protein dessert recipes because that is not what this is about; and quite frankly I'm sure it would bore most people to tears!

Forget the 12 week prep - It's all abut the 32 week prep!!

Lessons Learnt from Success

Lessons learnt from failure are usually much more glaringly obvious and I have certainly expressed those in previous posts! I wanted however to take a calm moment and think about the things I have learnt from the successes. They are a lot more subtle, but just as valuable.
Overall I'm pleased with progress, I'm getting closer to ticking boxes that make me competitive in my chosen category - Physique. I've added a good deal of muscularity to my upper body and hamstrings - previous areas of weakness. I do however, still only have 1 ab!

Aside from aesthetics, some of the main areas I will admit to doing right are:

•  Remaining Injury free

I have remained injury free for the whole duration of this training and in fact rehabilitated old injuries (unintentionally!). This is usually something that is unheard of for me. I have healthy strong hamstrings for the first time in 3 years (after battling with high hamstring tendinopathy in both legs). Perhaps it is the necessary requirement to address muscle imbalances which accumulate over time from doing sport, or the variation of training. I always try and vary exercise choice and training parameters as much as possible.

• Retaining cardiovascular fitness

Building/ retaining muscle and losing body fat is quite a tricky feat in reality - cardio plays a big role, but the wrong type and duration and the overall effect is too catabolic. The more muscular the competition category, the more precise cardio choice becomes, as muscle preservation is key. I have managed to keep my daily run (because I enjoy it!) and build muscle.  Maintaining an element of functional fitness is very important to me, as I enjoy being able to walk up a hill and not asphyxiate.

Lessons learnt from failures!

Now these are a bit more obvious because something usually goes very wrong physically, mentally or both!

•  When to push and when to maintain

This knowledge in itself has made me mentally stronger. Now, don't get me wrong there are days I thought I would break. But that's all it is - a bad day, and a new day starts tomorrow. I've settled into the diet and understanding my body. When to reduce training load...how to work with, and not against your menstrual cycle to train optimally. I also think being physically strong is a really good foundation for mental strength. There is no doubt the two are correlated. Of course, you can have one without the other but feeling strong keeps me going. It keeps me wanting to get out of bed in the morning!

• Patience ( A hard one)

Physical and mental Stress is accumulative and it transfers from mental to physical and vice versa.  It's a product of work, family life, relationships, financial circumstance etc etc. It constantly changes but it most definitely affects our physical vitality and performance. When you look at conventional bodybuilding preparation phases, they are usually 12-16 weeks long. For me, that is way too short. University assignment deadlines and studying on "low-carb" brain is not the easiest. I made the decision to give myself a longer prep phase for my first show and actually it suits. I like the more gradual approach. It feels like there is room for error, which creates a little more calm (around the storm). It also means I can do both jobs well, rather than doing a bad job on each.

•  Make your own rules

I would get frustrated when trying diets or training protocols that just didn't give me the rate of change of results I wanted. Learning to really listen to your body and not be afraid to bypass some conventional rules in training has actually been an eye opener. Some of these, perhaps I will be bold enough to share in another post, but not for now! One of the things with this sport, is individualisation is key. EVERYONE responds differently to stimulus and what suits in terms of: time of day to train, training volume, rest, recovery, nutrition, exercise choice etc is very unique to a single person. I'm fully aware that what works for me (found out through trial and error) is very different from another. Creating your own experiment within the realms of physiological principles is part of the process.

A finishing note

I'm a big believer in choosing goals wisely, then making a plan, reassessing the plan every few weeks and working out what you would view as a success and what you would view as a failure. It's quite an interesting process and subject to change, as it is all perspective. I have been so wrapped up in all the things that I feel have gone wrong; the illness, fatigue and moods, that sometimes you can't see the wood through the trees or the really good things that have happened as a "side effect".
It is an adventure for sure!